Holy Possum

Imagine my surprise when a creature just like this one turned up in MY palm tree! I just had to go check it out. I mean, who the hell did he think he was? That is MY palm tree. Yeah, my mistress doesn't really like me jumping down into it from the balcony, but I patrol it every single day from the balcony. Of course I had to go check him out. He was less than impressed. Somehow I ended up on the sidewalk below. It was the rustling of the palm tree that alerted my mistress that something was afoot...and before I knew it, the chase was on...down the stairs she came like a moose in a china shop...I better run or I'm going to get into serious trouble. Given it was dark, I had night on my side. I could easily hide out in the bushes surrounding the apartment block. Come get me, bitch...heh heh
     She gave it a good try, but I was too fast for her, and easily slipped away. I could hear her swearing and calling my name - awesome...she needs to get some of that out of her system. I think I'll just check out this courtyard right here - she can't get me in here. HA! she saw me go in under the courtyard gate and is now watching me from between the cracks of the wooden plank fence. You can't get me! You can't get me! And she's off...up the stairs again, more swearing...she doesn't seem to understand that I'm a bloody cat already, and have an incessant need to satisfy my curiosity. Up and down the stairs she went, but I was winning this particular game of hide and seek. By this point, I wasn't sure where that stupid possum was, but then when I didn't expect it, I heard him rustling above again in MY DAMN TREE! Then things got a little hairy...he began to growl and chitter at me. WTF is that noise? Can't you just meow so I can understand you? Idiot...I'm gonna kick your friggin ass, possum...just wait..
     Uh-oh, I think my mistress is onto me...I can't seem to tear my eyes away from that stupid possum, but she's getting closer. At least she doesn't have the broom this time....and then SWOOP, she got me. Dammit. The possum kept on chittering and growling at me, and at one point, I think he was mocking me. You just wait possum, your time shall come. I'll show you who owns that friggin tree...